Nov 19, 2009

17/42 Horrible Rest Day

Sorry I didn't post yesterday so hopefully I will do 2 today. I went down to UCLA to start my clinical trial. I've been happy and excited to think I'm getting better when in reality I was getting worse. A LOT WORSE! I had to get MRI and CT scans done again so they could have up to date scans for the trial. We were all in shock! 2 months ago I had just the one area in my leg that wasn't good so they did the surgery and I was good to go. Now, I have masses all over my body. 2 months. That's it. I now have 10-12 nodules in my liver (pretty much the whole thing) and numerous nodules in both lungs(all over the place). I sat and looked at my doctor in shock and just started crying all over the place.
Before yesterday life was starting to look good, I felt good, I had tons of options, and I was going to be a survivor of cancer. Yesterday I started the battle of my life praying to God that I will have one option and by a miracle it will save my life. It's so hard to tell everyone you love that you are now at risk to not be here soon let alone trying to believe it yourself.
I'm doing a ton of research on the biology of Melanoma and I got others that are going to help as well. Hopefully there is a breakthrough for me. Considering Melanoma doesn't have a cure yet all I can do is pray.
Monday I once again head back down to San Diego to get a liver biopsy so they can test the genetic make-up of the nodule(it would be awesome if they mixed my test up with someone else!) and hopefully give me some good options for a clinical trial. Stay classy San Diego!


  1. There are no words Amanda! Just keep fighting! We're all here for you!

  2. Doh. I'll be praying for you!

    Let me know if I can do anything.

  3. Thanks guys! I need all the support it reassures me to stay positive. I'm a fighter and will stay one!